If I was 19 it would have went something like this.. "I don't remember the last weekend I WASN"T drunk." Sadly (I think sadly??) the tides have turned and I have washed up on shore.... 26 years old and completely friggin boring.
I don't even have drinks with my boyfriend on a regular basis. He has martini's and I have Kool-aid. Ok well it is more like he has beer and I have a diet coke.... but whatever, it is the same thing. When I go out I always drive and so I don't drink. When did I get this responsible??
Last Saturday night I went to a fundraiser for my soccer team and I was sitting with some old friends, Kelly and Melina, that I hadn't really hung out with since I was 22. We were laughing about old times. The first night I met Melina we entered a contest at a beach party that consisted of us rubbing sun tan lotion all over each other on stage. It ended up being the kind that BURNS and we were covered in painful red streaks!! I would NEVER do that now (..ok so I am kind of glad about that but still..).
Being young and silly definatly had it's appeal. I liked the idea that my job wasn't forever and that I could run away from any given situation and there would still be a lot of time to make things right. The things I was afraid of were more a long the lines of; not having something to do on a saturday night, not ever finding a good man, and moving a way from my best friend and still being about to have a good time. I worried that I couldn't choose between an ex and his best friend and that I might not lose 5 lbs before next weekend.
As an adult I worry about money (do I make enough?? am I saving enough??), work (am I doing a good job?? will I get promoted??), my man (if he is unhappy will I know?? will I know soon enough to change it... will I be able to??). Instead of my weight, I worry about my "health." I never thought this would be me.
Sometimes I think that it would be easier to go back and live with my mom and step dad, go back to high school and talk on the phone 24/7. Sometimes I look at my life right now and think "Damn, I am lucky." I suppose it is like this for everyone.
I don't believe that living in a constant state of nostalgia is healthy. That is not what I am saying, I am just saying......
DAMN.. I really don't want to work tomorrow... I wish I could go out, party like a rockstar and sleep till noon. That would be sweet.
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